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Tuesday, August 01, 2006


Mets/Yanks Trade Deadline

The July 31st Trade Deadline came and went with some serious noise made in New York. The Bombers got a 4th or 5th starter and 2 very capable bats for an old lamp, a whiffle ball bat, a ball of yarn, and Shawn Chacon's ERA of a touchdown- with the extra point. The Mets, well, the Mets made me remember what it's been like to be a Mets fan for the last 23 years- except for when I was 3 and they won the World Series.

Perfect time for me to introduce you to the Choke Artist Rating System as I grade these moves. This was basically derived from me constantly abbreviating "Pretty Good" to "PG".

G = LAAAMME. Bambi was rated G.
PG = Pretty Good. PG can't really show you much though.
PG-13 = Above average. You are allowed to say the word "fuck" one time and might even see a boob if it is in good taste.
R = Pretty frickin nasty. Some of the best. Unlimited killing.
NC-17 = Filthy, Border-Line Disgusting. You don't see these much.

= PG

The Mets have the unfortunate curse of the terrorist cab drivers. I AM NOT generalizing that cab drivers are terrorists. I AM saying that this is the second time in 2 years a cab driver has terrorized a good Met pitcher. Duaner Sanchez separated his pitching shoulder in a cab accident in Florida the same day as the trade deadline! Last year, Tom Glavine lost 2 teeth in a similar incident. Only the Mets- and I guess maybe the Cubs have luck like this too. Sanchez is likely out for the season and we'll miss the 5-1, 2.60 ERA, and .167 against right handed hitters.

So panic mode ensues and Minaya trades our starting right fielder for a Triple A pitcher and a guy we gave up as a free agent after the '05 season. D'oh! Roberto Hernandez will try to fill Duaner's spot and Oliver Perez will try to return to 2004 form when his ERA was under 3 and he led the majors in strikeouts per 9 innings. This year: 2-10, 6.63 ERA. That is some G-rated sauce!

We lose Nady's power but gain defense and speed with the Endy Chavez/Milledge combo that will replace him. So since we could have just kept Hernandez originally, we essentially turned Mike Cameron into a Triple A pitcher- hate, hate, hate hate! I am trying to convince myself that we'll be ok without a major move for a starting pitcher. (Pounding head on desk with thoughts of a Pedro-Glavine-Benson-Kazmir top 4).

= R

Some serious noise made by the evil empire this week. Let it be known that I will write about the Yankees even though I hate them like a mosquito bite on the ass. I don't want to alienate the Yankee fans that I know because they outnumber the Met fans I know by about 573-8.

Bobby Abreu, horrible (for him) since All-Star break last year, but still an upgrade in the OF. I loathe the possibility of Abreu, MatSushi, and the Shef all returning to form in time for the playoffs. Cory Lidle will be fine with all the run support he'll get, maybe even good enough to pitch in a playoff series. Craig Wilson is having a typical year for him, you could expect .270, 25 HR, 80 RBI if he played every day. .360 OBP is nice also. He offers the flexibility of playing first base and the outfield. He also plays catcher a few times a year, which gives the Yanks a third catcher option for emergency situations.

Oh, I haven't talked about what they gave up because it was literally nothing. These are the type of deals that you dream about your team making. How many Yankee fans were thinking, "How sweet would that be to get Abreu for some no-name minor leaguers?" Well congratulations, the infinity payroll offers this type of flexibility.

yes dan. the yanks better the mets once again...jeff
yes dan. the yanks better the mets once again...jeff
yes dan. the yanks better the mets once again...jeff
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